FRANCK RIBERY WINS TITILE, GETS PUNKED BAD BY JEROME BOATENG

I've seen the fear that Ribery has in face one other time in my life and that was when most of the boys area at summer camp chased Dan Pios around the soccer field for absolutely no reason. Just started chanting his name and crowding him then he took off for his life. I mean look at the 12second mark of the video...guy is HUSTLING. Just played 90 minutes for a championship and now sprinting around the field being chased by his own teammates. Not only being chased, but he thinks he's out run Boateng and then gets cornered by Alaba till he gets drenched. To be honest though, they played Augsburg and won 3-0 so this was probably the hardest he had to work all week. He had to have been laying on the ground thinking he'd have to stop being Muslim, transfer clubs and eventually have to figure out how to murder Boateng without getting blamed. 

Me and my bro Ribéry everything is Fine it was nonalcohol Beer so all Good pic.twitter.com/rg6w6OGFdN

— Jerome Boateng (@JB17Official) May 14, 2013

RIO FERDINAND..

 DM -Manchester United defender Rio Ferdinand has called for an overhaul of the Professional Footballers' Association's 'flawed' Player of the Year voting system. Tottenham forward Gareth Bale scooped both the main award and young player honour last month, before adding the Football Writers' prize as well. For the prestigious FWA honour, members could vote virtually until the result was confirmed. Yet the players have to vote much earlier, which Ferdinand feels leads to an inadequate conclusion. 'The problem with the PFA awards is that the voting system is flawed,' Ferdinand told manutd.com. 'There's so much technology at hand that you could do it over an iPad and just say 'bang, bang, bang' at the end of the season. 'I am not just being biased but if it was voted for today Robin van Persie would win it by a country mile. But it was voted for by the players in late February or March. Gareth Bale is a worthy winner, but for me it isn't a true reflection of the season.'

"True reflection of the season". RVP scores one league goal between January 30th and April 16th. United lose one game in that stretch. During the same stretch, Gareth Bale had eight goals and scored in every game but two. The result of those two games? Spurs losses. You tell me which player was more valuable you...I honestly couldn't think of a word off the top of my head so figured any of the below words would work to describe him.

RYAN CLARK TALKS SHIT ABOUT BRADY. CITES HIS ONE WIN VS BRADY IN THREE TRIES

PFT -"Steelers safety Ryan Clark is already licking his chops about playing the Patriots in Week Nine. Clark said on ESPN that the Patriots have taken a step backward by replacing Wes Welker with the “fragile” Danny Amendola, and that quarterback Tom Brady struggles when he starts to feel pressure and can’t find an open receiver. “I think what’s really underestimated is Wes Welker’s importance to not only the New England Patriots, but Tom Brady,” Clark said. “Losing him is huge. . . . I know they think Danny Amendola can come in and have the same type of numbers he had with the Rams, but we also have to remember, he’s fragile.” Clark believes that if Brady isn’t seeing his favorite receiver getting open quickly, then Brady is going to struggle. “When Tom Brady gets pressure and when you’re man-to-man and bumping those guys and making it hard for him to throw, he sees ghosts,” Clark said. “Even when guys aren’t around him, even when he’s not about to be sacked, when his clock goes off in his head that the ball should be out, we’ll see him duck, we’ll see him flinch. When you get Tom Brady doing that, the whole New England Patriots mystique goes away.” Clark referenced a 2011 game when the Steelers beat the Patriots and held Brady to 198 passing yards. “Two years ago we played them and dominated them because we went man-to-man and had a big corner in Cortez Allen on [Rob] Gronkowski, and made it hard for Tom Brady to get the ball off, in timing, and made him to have to make plays. It was hard for him.”

Does he think people are taking his opinions and insight seriously? No one cares if you think Danny Amendola is "fragile" or what you think of Tom Brady's pocket presence. Why doesn't anyone care? Cause the Steelers never beat New England. Maybe once out of five tries. What makes Clark's statement even more of a joke is him referencing that they held Brady to 198 yards passing in 2011. Those 198 yards would back you up a little more if Brady didn't throw for 749yds with 7 TDs and no picks in the two other games you played against him. Don't feel like bringing up your coverage schemes for those games? Very convenient.

GUY HAS THE SNIFFLES FOR A YEAR AND A HALF CAUSE HIS BRAIN WAS LEAKING

MyFoxPheonix -"For more than a year and a half, Joe Nagy's nose just wouldn't stop running.

The condition occurred once or twice a week, especially when he sat up in bed, but within a short time his nose ran constantly. At first he put it down to year-round allergies caused by the Arizona weather. 

 Eventually, Mr Nagy's condition became unbearable,' I got to the point where I had tissues all the time' he told Fox 10. It also caused Joe some embarrassing moments in public. On several occasions he failed to reach his tissues in time and fluid would spill out. He finally went to the doctor to be told his runny nose was far from run-of-mill allergies: his brain was leaking. Mr Nagy underwent surgery. It didn't require any cutting into the brain itself. Instead the procedure is carried out through the nose and essentially glue was used to seal up the hole. 'This is just a bit of cartilage from the nose that we can get to repair over it and then the body will seal it up,' said Doctor Nakaji. This week, the gauze was removed by doctors from his nose. Joe began to wait for the dripping to begin.

'I was waiting for the dribble. This leaking cause I was so used to it every day. I got my hankie. Nothing. It's never come back.'

It's amazing to me that this guy last a year and a half. Not because he had brain fluid leaking out of his face, but because no one murdered this guy for sniffling and having a runny nose for that long. He must not have many friends and definitely not married because no sane person would see this guy every day listening to him sniffle and not suffocate him to death, yet alone live with him And you know what, it wouldn't surprise me if Joe Nagy agreed with me if you had told him from the start he'd have brain water coming out of his nose on a daily basis

OTIS NIXON...EEESH

DM -"A legendary former Major League baseball star was arrested over the weekend and booked on drug possession. Otis Nixon, a longtime center fielder, was pulled over in suburban Atlanta just after midnight when a passerby called 911 to complain about his Dodge Ram 'weaving.' Officers investigating the scene reportedly found a crack pipe in Nixon's pants and a crack rock in the vehicle and arrested Nixon, 54, on possession of cocaine. An incident report from the Cherokee County Sheriff's Department notes that another pipe and more crack rocks were discovered in the floor board of the car. A field sobriety test was administered and it was determined that Nixon was not under the influence of crack cocaine. The former player told the police that the substances they found were crack cocaine but that neither the pipes nor drugs belonged to him."

Straight out of the Faces of Meth Hall of Fame, Otis Nixon looking like the mitt he used to play with. I know the expression is "crack kills", but I bet D.A.R.E would have a better chance reaching kids if they used this picture and said "crack scrunches the shit out of you face".

JUANNNNN MATAA!!!!!!!!

GET OFF THE FIELD FERGUSON YOU FOSSIL! CMON CHELS!!!!!

HOW DO YOU SAY 'GOOD NIGHT' IN SWISS?

Never in doubt. When is the final for this tournament anyway?